Does making yourself the most important person in your life make you uncomfortable?
I asked 10,000 women and the answer was overwhelmingly yes, according to women. (The few brave men who responded said no. For them filling their bucket up before they pour from it is a pretty basic concept.)
We’ve got work to do.
Why do women feel selfish or even guilty for putting themselves first?
–We’ve confused self-
–We fear that others will think we’re greedy and bad. Consequently, they’ll withhold the approval we crave.
–We believe that self-neglect makes more time and resources available for more important things.
–We don’t believe we are important enough to be first in anyone’s life.
–The women who influenced us didn’t teach us to make self-love and care a priority.
–We see a world full of selfishness and short-sighted thinking and believe that focusing on ourselves adds to it.
Any of this feel familiar?
The truth about taking care of you first.
–Life decisions made in a HALT (hungry, angry, tired, lonely) state are rarely optimal and often troublesome. Improving your nutrition, physical activity, sleep, and emotional habits makes you healthier and happier. When you feel better you’ll do better.
–What others think of you isn’t your business. What you think of you is what matters. When your mind is free and focused on what’s important to you, you’ll come up with smarter, more creative, and more effective solutions to every challenge you encounter.
–Continuously fill your cup to overflow and you’ll be able to help in a much greater way without draining yourself dry.
–Focusing on your wellbeing is not a privilege for certain women, it’s a necessity for all. Women are the mothers, professionals, wives, friends, daughters, sisters, and lovers who channel grace, healing, and compassion to the world. The world needs you at your best.
–Do you want your daughters and peers to over-work and under-love themselves? Or, do you want them to value themselves and maintain their minds, bodies, and spirits? You can talk about this all day long, but it won’t stick until you model it.
–When you play small, consuming yourself with little things and pleasing others, you stifle the gifts Creation instilled in you. You’re here to give your gifts, but you can’t if you’re last on your list.
–Through your self-development, broad thinking, and communion with like minds, you can rise to significant positions capable of creating large-scale change.
Still feeling bad about being #1?
Think of a woman you admire. It might be Michelle Obama, Oprah Winfrey, Elenor Roosevelt, Melinda Gates, Dianne Von Furstenberg, or someone else.
What if these women prioritized others over their own self-care and interests?
We wouldn’t know who they are.
Taking excellent care of yourself opens the way for you to become your greatest self.
Give yourself this gift. Leave a comment and tell me one thing you’re going to do today to take better care of you.
Need a boost? Open a chat with me on Facebook Messenger: m.me/LifeBlog
I am going to meditate, do some emotional freedom technique tapping and enjoy a nourishing meal at my favourite restaurant. I have space for these things today, so I am going to take it. Thanks for your constant wisdom, Cynthia!
Catherine, did you follow through? How did it go? <3