Years ago, my (then) husband suffered a devastating stroke.  He was young, healthy and vibrant and I loved him tremendously. One afternoon, we were pursuing our dreams and celebrating our five-year-old daughter, the next I was standing in intensive care, praying he wouldn’t die.  When he finally emerged from a coma, his memory and our life together, were gone.  It was soul-ripping.

My friends and family, in an effort to help, lavished me with condolences and words of encouragement.  They sent me books on grief recovery and desperately tried to hold my head above the waters of despair.  Nothing helped, I wanted to die.  

In my search for solace, I found a tiny book with a bit of wisdom so powerful I knew it was true.  It said:

The one thing you can count on is change.  All things change, including feelings.  You will not always feel the way you do today.

I wrote this on a piece of my daughter’s Hello Kitty paper and stuck it to my bathroom wall.  My bathroom was the one place I could grieve freely and I did, a lot.  When the waves of sadness ceased, I always found myself staring at the paper and knowing that the blackness could not be eternal.  It didn’t change my feelings, but it reassured me.

For my friends who are suffering and believing the sun will never shine again, it will.  It must.

I love you.

Photo Credit:”Waiting for Sunrise” Temari 09

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